so little time

It feels much later than 11:02 pm.

This semester I've been really busy. My days are pretty full, with classes, work, homework/reading, quiz practice, babysitting, or running errands of sorts. This semester, as compared to last year, is a lot more hectic, and a lot more work, and a lot more jampacked.

I have said a thousand times how much I love quizzing, but I'll say it again. I love quizzing a whole lot! Tonight after practice, when I went to give Andrew the calc book, Jennie and Sondra came over and talked to me for a bit. Then we saw Lucas too, who was excited to see us.

I'm learning a lot about ministry and my spiritual gifts through quizzing.
1. Ministry is draining work, when you throw your entire self into it.
2. I've realized the body of Christ metaphor (1 Cor. 12) in my part of Wolly quizzing. I was kinda jealous that others were the go-to people in terms of advice, and wished that it could be ME that they went to. I thought and prayed about it that night, as I wrote in my journal, and realized that my part is behind the scenes, and maybe the others' can actually do a better job at their roles than I think they can/give them credit for. The position works for me: it allows me to be my introverted self, and to be organized and such. I like it. Not to mention it frees up everyone else to do their jobs.
2b. My spiritual gifts are Helps, Service, Knowledge, Missionary, Encouragement, Hospitality. Approximately in that order, averaged over a 3 year or so period.
3. I can still be interact with the quizzers, and try to encourage them. That's always exciting. It's really fun, and I can't wait for Maine this weekend. :D I volunteered to do the devotional a few weeks from now on Acts 12, although what or how I'll do, I have NO IDEA. But that'll be God working through me, and helping me know what to say.
4. In areas that I'm not as great in, I can't do a good job if I don't ask for help from God. For instance, I needed to reply to something the other day, and hadn't a clue how to word what I was saying, so I prayed for guidance and tact and all that good stuff, and it didn't come out half bad. Thanks, God.

As far as my days and minutes being packed, I'm serious. I haven't got much of a social life this year, outside of roommates, quizzing, whoever visits the room, Homecoming, and a few other things. I don't terribly mind. I'm realizing with my introvertedness, I'd much rather be close to a select few (though who those people are, I don't know), than to have a large circle of close friends. Something like that. Basically, I'm being really select about my social time, and putting studies and God first. I'm also watching my online time, like the time that I spend repeatedly checking Facebook, Hotmail, and Xanga. That time can definitely be better used.

I seriously have practically no time to think about boys. You know what I mean. I have no time to spend for a relationship right now, so therefore there's no thinking. Also, I have no time to think. It's almost nicer that way, to not think about things, but probably isn't good. I try to write in my journal and talk to a few close friends about stuff. I can't reach out to everyone, so I think my personality will make me intensely reach out to a few.

Compared to last year at this time, I think I've learned more from God. I'm pretty excited that my spiritual life is improving. Though as I write this, I realize how incredibly sterile that sounds. English classes: agh. Because I'm selective with my time, I'm more conscious about what I'm doing, and that in order to survive, I have to take breaks as well as talk to God about stuff. I'm still working on the reading-books-of-the-Bible-other-than-Acts part.

I have a C- in Calc 3. That's the lowest grade I've EVER gotten. I'm challenging myself to hopefully pull off a B in the class. I'm not sure how it'll mess with my GPA, but since my GPA has been pretty much fine since now, it shouldn't do too much damage. This semester has a lot more work, but that may be because in addition to doing about the same amount of reading, I'm also writing more papers than I did last year. Everything will be getting more intense in these next two weeks, with due dates and group projects and stuff, so if you can pray for me, that'd be super.

People have changed. I've changed. I've drifted from people I was once close to, and have made new acquaintances due to work and classes. Sometimes I wish I could always have the same people in my life, and that things would not be sketchy or awkward, but changing circumstances have shaped me into my current state. Friendships take work, something I have noticed, something I want to fix, but something that I am unwilling to make the effort to improve.

I really miss my Spanish. I momentarily met a Spanish professor as he picked up a test at CAS today. Jenny is doing a sort of Nazarene "study abroad" thing, where she's still enrolled at NNU but is taking classes here for a semester. I mentioned tonight at quizzing, slightly bitterly, "I wish there was a way for me to take Spanish at Olivet and actually have it count for something here!" Prof responded, "Well, why not?" I MISS SPANISH. ENC with all its diversity should have it!

As I am moving into a form of rant, I think I'm going to head to bed. It's now 11:56, but I haven't been writing all that time. Too bad I can't write papers like this.