home and church

Being at my home church was pretty nice. I went to the other adult SS class, which I liked. Apparently the pastor's wife is going to start a young-adult age class next month. I wonder about it. Aside from the fact that many college agers are away at college most of the time, is it going to meet our needs? Ok, so that's selfish sounding. Maybe, rather than that, will we be able and willing to contribute to the class, and the way we actually view things, and how theology plays itself out in our lives? I'll just have to wait and see.

I talked to some of the teens today, but not too much. They're doing the service tonight, "Second Sunday Concert Series", and will be doing some songs and drama stuff. Yay! I'll actually be around for it! I didn't think I would be, so that's exciting. Maybe Jamie will actually come.

Pastor McDonald preached on ACTS (!!!) 9:1-6 today, and when I talked to Jen afterwards, she said, "I heard, then thought, 'Chapter 9'...I should know that..." haha. I can't wait to see her and Chelsea this weekend! (and Angel too)

Delaney, after service, was at the microphone calling out, "Everybody, gather up!" (to hear her sing). haha.

I could never live at home and have to do college classes and stuff. It is far too distracting, even being here for the weekend. I've done some studying and paper-writing, but this environment means relaxing, taking a break, and my dorm room says: "DO WORK!" See? I'm typing a blog! This reminds me of the summertime, keeping in touch with everyone from ENC.

Last night was AMAZING. We asked Pop-Pop, on a scale of 1-10, how he thought the day went, and he said 20. Awww. :) He was totally surprised to see Aunt Lori and I, and remembering how it took him FOREVER to notice us makes me laugh. 85 people ended up showing up, from both Mom-Mom and Pop-Pop's sides of the family, as well as church family. I got to see family that I don't usually see, like Mom-Mom's sister Aunt Mary (I love her). I did see a
bunch of Coheys, but I see them all the time, so if I miss seeing some of them at the holidays, I won't be terribly heartbroken, since I got to see them. It was nice talking to Pastor McDonald for a little while too. It was fun seeing the little kids last night, like Roman and his yoda-like ears. He's getting so big.

Kevin: "Do you like cold ice?"

Today Kevin asked me if I was going to school, cuz he seems to understand that I'm not always there because I have to go to school, far away. He was kicking his feet against the toybox, as he swung his feet, and was like, "This is like a bass drum".

I'm still trying to figure out my new niche back at Chestertown church, or if I have one other than being the grown-up kid that isn't quite grown-up. Some validation or something would be nice, but I mean, I'm rarely there, so there's not much I can do. Probably over Christmas I'll do nursery a few times, and see if Beth can use me with the teens. Maybe I'll ask her tonight.

life as a college student

Life right now:

The Good:
~I got a 100% on my Educ. exam and a 98% on my Linguistics one.
~Walmart's Trail Mix is really good.
~I'm understanding what we're doing in Calc 3 right now! There's a little bit that I don't quite get, though.
~Concentration Camp was last weekend, and it was super amazing. I'll put quotes up later.
~I babysit tomorrow. :)
~I'm unofficially going to the quiz this month. Meaning, I'm going to fulfill my Wolly duties but not being an official since I'm going home for the weekend. (shhh)
~I got my Wolly quiz t-shirt tonight! YES! First ever!
~I'm almost done Christmas shopping for my family--I just need to get something for Mom-Mom and Dad.

The Bad:
~I have 2 papers due Friday, one of which I don't want to do but I need to quit saying that.
~I need to do laundry this weekend.
~I'm not sure what I want to be "when I grow up." "Yo no quiero ser grande; soy un chico Toys R Us"

The Ugly:
~I have, as of this moment, 86 meals left to last me till the end of J-term. This means some strategic eating on my part.

Now to organize what I'm taking home (yes, that is NEXT weekend, but it gets me out of doing homework).

so little time

It feels much later than 11:02 pm.

This semester I've been really busy. My days are pretty full, with classes, work, homework/reading, quiz practice, babysitting, or running errands of sorts. This semester, as compared to last year, is a lot more hectic, and a lot more work, and a lot more jampacked.

I have said a thousand times how much I love quizzing, but I'll say it again. I love quizzing a whole lot! Tonight after practice, when I went to give Andrew the calc book, Jennie and Sondra came over and talked to me for a bit. Then we saw Lucas too, who was excited to see us.

I'm learning a lot about ministry and my spiritual gifts through quizzing.
1. Ministry is draining work, when you throw your entire self into it.
2. I've realized the body of Christ metaphor (1 Cor. 12) in my part of Wolly quizzing. I was kinda jealous that others were the go-to people in terms of advice, and wished that it could be ME that they went to. I thought and prayed about it that night, as I wrote in my journal, and realized that my part is behind the scenes, and maybe the others' can actually do a better job at their roles than I think they can/give them credit for. The position works for me: it allows me to be my introverted self, and to be organized and such. I like it. Not to mention it frees up everyone else to do their jobs.
2b. My spiritual gifts are Helps, Service, Knowledge, Missionary, Encouragement, Hospitality. Approximately in that order, averaged over a 3 year or so period.
3. I can still be interact with the quizzers, and try to encourage them. That's always exciting. It's really fun, and I can't wait for Maine this weekend. :D I volunteered to do the devotional a few weeks from now on Acts 12, although what or how I'll do, I have NO IDEA. But that'll be God working through me, and helping me know what to say.
4. In areas that I'm not as great in, I can't do a good job if I don't ask for help from God. For instance, I needed to reply to something the other day, and hadn't a clue how to word what I was saying, so I prayed for guidance and tact and all that good stuff, and it didn't come out half bad. Thanks, God.

As far as my days and minutes being packed, I'm serious. I haven't got much of a social life this year, outside of roommates, quizzing, whoever visits the room, Homecoming, and a few other things. I don't terribly mind. I'm realizing with my introvertedness, I'd much rather be close to a select few (though who those people are, I don't know), than to have a large circle of close friends. Something like that. Basically, I'm being really select about my social time, and putting studies and God first. I'm also watching my online time, like the time that I spend repeatedly checking Facebook, Hotmail, and Xanga. That time can definitely be better used.

I seriously have practically no time to think about boys. You know what I mean. I have no time to spend for a relationship right now, so therefore there's no thinking. Also, I have no time to think. It's almost nicer that way, to not think about things, but probably isn't good. I try to write in my journal and talk to a few close friends about stuff. I can't reach out to everyone, so I think my personality will make me intensely reach out to a few.

Compared to last year at this time, I think I've learned more from God. I'm pretty excited that my spiritual life is improving. Though as I write this, I realize how incredibly sterile that sounds. English classes: agh. Because I'm selective with my time, I'm more conscious about what I'm doing, and that in order to survive, I have to take breaks as well as talk to God about stuff. I'm still working on the reading-books-of-the-Bible-other-than-Acts part.

I have a C- in Calc 3. That's the lowest grade I've EVER gotten. I'm challenging myself to hopefully pull off a B in the class. I'm not sure how it'll mess with my GPA, but since my GPA has been pretty much fine since now, it shouldn't do too much damage. This semester has a lot more work, but that may be because in addition to doing about the same amount of reading, I'm also writing more papers than I did last year. Everything will be getting more intense in these next two weeks, with due dates and group projects and stuff, so if you can pray for me, that'd be super.

People have changed. I've changed. I've drifted from people I was once close to, and have made new acquaintances due to work and classes. Sometimes I wish I could always have the same people in my life, and that things would not be sketchy or awkward, but changing circumstances have shaped me into my current state. Friendships take work, something I have noticed, something I want to fix, but something that I am unwilling to make the effort to improve.

I really miss my Spanish. I momentarily met a Spanish professor as he picked up a test at CAS today. Jenny is doing a sort of Nazarene "study abroad" thing, where she's still enrolled at NNU but is taking classes here for a semester. I mentioned tonight at quizzing, slightly bitterly, "I wish there was a way for me to take Spanish at Olivet and actually have it count for something here!" Prof responded, "Well, why not?" I MISS SPANISH. ENC with all its diversity should have it!

As I am moving into a form of rant, I think I'm going to head to bed. It's now 11:56, but I haven't been writing all that time. Too bad I can't write papers like this.

role model

It seems to me that if you are thrust (or just merely placed) in a leadership role, you are very much expected to work a lot harder to improve your skills, in order to be a role model. My two situations are quizzing and my Teaching Composition class (also working at CAS).

With quizzing, I am continually needing to be a spiritual role model, which means that I need to continue growing closer to God. And reading my Bible and praying and stuff. Not that that is always happening, but it should.

As far as Teaching Composition and working at CAS, I feel like my writing skills have improved this semester--maybe it's because I'm writing more papers or something. In order to actually be able to help others, I have to adhere to a higher standard.

Basically, I'm just feeling really challenged right now, to keep growing spiritually and academically. Last night I was being really philosophical and pensive and wanted to write stuff that I had thought about the Lauren Winner thing, but I decided it was much better (and required less work and time to write) to discuss it with people.

Vermont tonight!

*edit a few days later*
This is a quote I found in a teaching writing book, of all places. It totally fits.

"The developmental importance of ecological transitions derives from the fact that they almost invariably involve a change in role, that is in the expectations for behavior associated with particular positions in society. Roles have a magiclike power to alter how a person is treated, how she acts, what she does, and thereby even what she thinks and feels." (Bronfenbrenner)

it's not always peachykeen

...from relevantmagazine.com....
"Student ministry is numbers-driven. If you don’t have a large number of students attending, you must be doing something wrong; either that, or the kids don’t think you’re cool. ...If your ministry isn’t growing, the parents will start clamoring for a new youth pastor, someone more entertaining, someone who doesn’t turn their kids into “radicals,” someone who will teach the kids to be “good boys” and “good girls.” " (The Art of True Rebellion)

I sometimes feel this way about my youth group, like we just do "fun" things and nobody's really challenged, and we're talked "at" and don't really discuss stuff. It's ministry and church, not entertainment. What if we started asking them what God's been doing in their lives, how they're living for God?

"The goal of ministry is to promote pure living, but to instill a heart for social justice as well."

I feel like our youth group is all about bringing our friends to fun events, and not really how to reach out to people and meet their needs even if we're uncomfortable with their lifestyles. This as in contrast to avoiding anyone who could "corrupt" us.

"We once did an event called “Destination Unknown,” taking the kids to an undisclosed location for a night of fun. Some members of our group were conspicuously absent. One mom reported to me that she didn’t send her children because, “We thought you would take them to some homeless shelter or something.” She went on to add, “By the way, when are you taking the kids to Six Flags? That’s the kind of thing they really like to do.” "

WHAT?!? We did a sort of Destination Unknown once, and it seemed like no one really knew what to do. There should be "training" (definitely NOT the kind found in the Jesus Camp movie) that gets teens into studying the Bible on their own, and growing closer to God, so that they will be prepared to live like Jesus did. Jesus wasn't about fun kitschy events.

"“Follow” is a verb. Something must be done in order to meet the requirements of the command."

You're going to have to work hard. You're not always going to be excited about the work you do. You're not always going to have a peachy keen life. It's a higher standard. You're not always around your friends. You're not always in your safe little Christian bubble. You're not always serving alongside the greatest of people. But we're, as a whole, not the greatest of people. We're called to serve others. We're part of the body of Christ. The hand can't say to the eye, "I can do your job better than you." It's not possible.

The end.

Mudhouse Sabbath

So tomorrow I'm in a book group to discuss Lauren Winner's book "Mudhouse Sabbath," and I'm just starting the book now (borrowing it from Laura). :) Here are some quotes I found interesting:

"In churches and homes everywhere people are increasingly interested in doing Christianity, not just speaking or believing it." (xi)

"Practicing the spiritual disciplines does not make us Christians. Instead, the practicing teaches us what it means to live as Christians." (xii) {idea that practice makes perfect? hmm...helps us to love God more, to love others more?}

"What this all boils down to (and boiling is another thing you cannot do on Shabbat) is do not create....Do not create anything at all, for one of the things the Sabbath reprises is God's rest after He finished creating." (6)

"The Hebrew word for holy means, literally, "set apart." " (9)

"Rest for the sake of future productivity is at odds with the spirit of Shabbat...In observing the Sabbath, one is both giving a gift to God and imitating Him." (11)

"To keep kosher is to infuse the simple act of feeding oneself with meaning and consequence." (17)

"The voice is talking not just about food, but also about people; the instructions are not simply to eat, but also to invite both Jews and Gentiles into the Kingdom of God." [Acts 10] (20)

"This God who is interested in how we speak, how we handle our money, how we carry our bodies--He is also interested in how we live with food." (21)

magazine quotes

I suspect few of us face hurdles to "quiet time" anywhere near the ones she overcame. Yet we often give up when challenged by far less. And we suffer spiritual anemia when we don't figure out a way or a time slot to make it happen. (on boundless.org)

Over the past couple of years, I’ve been examining my faith—what I believe and why I believe it. That process has produced a wide range of emotion and revelation. Having grown up under the tutelage and influence of Americanized, western religious culture, I discovered that much of what I believed fit quite nicely into my preference for order and organization. In fact, what I really discovered in my beliefs about God and how He fit into my life could be packaged quite neatly into parameters and institutional definitions learned within the context of what we call “religion.” I could place it all in a box marked “God Stuff,” and set it on a shelf, right where it belongs next to the rest of my organized life. (relevantmagazine.com, An Unrestricted Jesus)

When I looked at Jesus, He seemed more concerned with feeding the hungry. ....Jesus said sell everything you have and give your money to the poor. ...I discovered that Jesus was more interested in defending the weak and marginalized. I could go on, because my box was quite full. As I unpacked the box, and stacked its contents up against the Jesus I rediscovered in scripture, I soon realized that God no longer fit in that box. He was so much more than, and nothing like, the religious ideology I had packaged Him with. And I discovered that I have so much more to learn, un-learn and re-learn about my faith. (An Unrestricted Jesus)

Elizabeth's encounter with Zsófi reminds us that evangelism is not a science. There are numerous methods that can help get us started, but no single method "works" in every situation. On the contrary, the very nature of telling the message of Jesus Christ to people requires sensitivity, discernment, and variation in style. (Taking Love Next Door, boundless.org)

This passage has oft been quoted as the missions passage that calls us to evangelize the world. But Jesus isn't interested in us just preaching the gospel; He commands us to "make disciples of all nations." Our evangelistic task is never finished when someone prays a prayer or walks an aisle. Jesus charges us not only to introduce people to His grace, but to help them grow in Christ. (Taking Love Next Door)

Evangelism is all about love — loving a person enough to share the message of Jesus Christ with him and loving him enough to teach him the commands of Jesus, the truths of Scripture, the walk of faith. Loving him enough to disciple him. It is the responsibility of the Church by the Spirit to guide people from pre-Christian life toward maturity in Christ, but it is our individual responsibility to make sure we connect people to the church and to God's truth. (Taking Love Next Door)

"open your eyes and take a good look"

Isn't it a bit unnerving/crazy/weird when you begin to see how things keep coming up, and you see the possibility of what your life could be that you NEVER would've come up with on your own? Interesting things are going on, that I think God may be prodding me in a certain direction, and I can look back and see how events/people in my life have brought me to this point.

Sept/Oct 06 issue of Relevant:
"Are you going to seek God, trust that He has a plan (even if it's one you didn't know about), and follow Him? Or are you going to keep your head down and try to keep life how it is, completely missing something He might've been trying to talk to you about?" (14)

"Learn what it means to love broken people. Don't turn away from the things you don't understand....Don Miller writes in Blue Like Jazz that "something was broken in the world and we were supposed to hold our palms against the wound." That's it. We're called to stop the bleeding. We're called to change the world." (28, twloha.com)

23-24 "It's who you are and the way you live that count before God. Your worship must engage your spirit in the pursuit of truth. That's the kind of people the Father is out looking for: those who are simply and honestly themselves before him in their worship. God is sheer being itself—Spirit. Those who worship him must do it out of their very being, their spirits, their true selves, in adoration."

34-35 Jesus said, "The food that keeps me going is that I do the will of the One who sent me, finishing the work he started. As you look around right now, wouldn't you say that in about four months it will be time to harvest? Well, I'm telling you to open your eyes and take a good look at what's right in front of you. These Samaritan fields are ripe. It's harvest time!

a crash course in youth ministry

This weekend I went to Maine for a kickoff quiz retreat with the Wollaston quiz team. To describe the weekend in a nutshell, I think I'd have to call it "a crash course in youth ministry."

First off, I was immediately thrown into my role as "district liasion" or whatever you want to call it. Prof had me start collecting registration money, and I had to also figure out who had already given me money. Next time around, I'm making a checklist.

When we stopped for dinner at Wendy's, we discovered that Pudge (the van) had an issue with a radiator hose. Post-dinner we practiced In Christ Alone and Prince of Peace out in the parking lot, trying to get the notes the best we could, trying to organize the parts the best way. We ended up staying there for quite a while as Prof made calls to decide on the best course of action. Mostly I helped maintain order, and as well bonded with the quizzers so that I was no longer, "Who are you again?" We did some crazy stuff, like dancing to Switchfoot, singing random camp-type songs, and going in out of Wendy's a lot. This kid Drew hung out with us while his dad tried to help us out. Sweetness. The quizzers connected with him and let him join in on the fun. That was really cool.

We did make it to Maine, thanks to a Nashua van. Speaking of Nashua, I need to go find a thankyou card. We got to bed pretty late, almost 1:30, and then got about 5ish hours of sleep.

During the day, I "scorekept" (kept tally is what I figured was best for their King of the Hill type quizzing) in one room. At lunch Lori recruited me to quizmaster in a different area. Though I wasn't too sure about doing it, I went ahead, and was able to trade off a few times and get a break. I thought at times I was being too strict with my calls on the answers, but Prof said I was doing fine. I added little study/quiz tips here and there, like making up your own questions in your head. This one kid from "Skow" (Skowhegan?) said that actually helped him move up a room. Wow. Quizmastering wasn't as bad as I'd thought, because I was doing what seemed to be a mid-JV level. I was also really tired. :)

Part of the afternoon I was with the quizzers studying, as they waited for the other team. One was getting antsy, so I kept trying to give him new ways of studying. I also had one quizzer mention "Akel-damia" (like macadamia) instead of Akeldama, as well as say that the men that appeared to the apostles were "two white men" and not "two men dressed in white."

Worship was really good, and I was thinking during the day about this: I was absolutely exhausted but yet God was still using me, and keeping me going.

Last night in one of our Wolly girls' rooms, a few of us stayed up late talking about anything and everything. Mostly dating, God's beginning, mysteries that we can only come up with more questions for, the da Vinci Code, and reaching out. Amazing.

After breakfast, we headed out to the Brunswick church: a very small congregation with about 40 people (yes I counted as we sang). Prof had us mingling with the congregation, and the people I met included the father of a pastor in Delaware, as well as the uncle of a girl from Second Willy last year. At lunch I sat with this elderly couple. Dick was so funny. I said something about pepperoni, and he called it snakemeat, saying rattlesnakes were around. Jennie was like, "Really!?"

On our way home, we stopped in Freeport at the LLBean place. That was pretty cool, and I returned my backpack (with a broken zipper) and got a giftcard to order another online. Now I'm back at ENC, hopefully going to bed in a little bit since I'm so exhausted.

So would you youth-ministry types say I got a good glimpse into what it is like being involved in youth ministry?

gutsy faith part 1

This summer, I got Gutsy Faith by Jeff Edmonson for free in exchange for a book review. Finally I am getting around to it, using it as my devotional book. I don't know that I've really worked through a book completely--I usually have had the topical teen devotionals, and just skipped around.

Chapter 1 (introduction of sorts): I think I'm going to like the format of the chapters, with stuff to reflect on both in the beginning and at the end. I'm looking forward to being challenged, and growing closer to God this semester.

I think some of the questions at the end of chapter 1 should be rearranged. Maybe to this:
What does it mean to you to have a gutsy faith?
Name at least five people in the course of your life whom you see as having a gutsy faith.
Do you think of yourself as a person with a gutsy faith? Why or why not?
What characteristics do these people possess that you would like to see developed in your life?

I'm not sure about the last 3 questions, the ones on page 15: They seem a bit ...out of place perhaps? I'm not sure if "If not, why do you want to develop those characterstics in your life?" applies to the people question or the self question. In other words, they just seem nonlinear to me.