Sunday, December 31, 2006

2007 Here I come!

Well folks, it's the end of 2006. I suppose I could make some rather interesting entry, but I think what I'm going to do is read through my Xangas from the year. That should be interesting in itself. But here is some of my year in a nutshell:

~Belize and Guatemala
~more quizzing, and going to regionals
~showing up to two MAD Impact weekends, unannounced or so
~turning 19 (not terribly exciting)
~writing letters and getting cards from friends at camp
~being introduced to new music
~hearing Michael Card and Rob Bell speak
~seeing Mat Kearney in concert
~having a crazy semester
~growing closer to God
~having friends visit campus (whether Angel and my cousins this fall, or people at FOL)
~getting really involved in quizzing this year
~babysitting a LOT
~working at CAS

Hmm that's about all I've got right now. I'm going to watch the video for this song, and leave you with the lyrics and also the video. It's called "Wonder of It All (Next Year)" by Monday Morning.




all my hopes and dreams inside
visions lurk behind my eyes
something new behind it grows
and You smile as my heart knows
to be another still with You
I’m the one that loved You through
but I’m still nothing next to You
I’m still nothing next to You

what I’ve seen and where I’ve been
what’s breaking out and breaking in
who I love and I despise
melting into compromise
how I’ve changed and how I’ve learned
becoming less becoming more

but I’m still nothing next to you
I’m still nothing without you

the sickness my mind’s battled long
the center of my every song
the beauty of my voice it fades
into a spiritual cascade
flowing from Your perfect smile
I’ve avoided all the while
but I’m still nothing next to you
I’m still nothing next to you

all the future seems unclear
never moving never near
but You hold me as I scream
wake me from my wicked dream
something out there waits for me
hand in hand we wait for it
but I’m still nothing next to You
I’m still nothing without to You

and the wonder of it all is I’m still standing
and the wonder of it all is we’re still standing
never planned it
and I wonder where I’ll be next year

will You stand right next to me
will You hold me faithfully
should I question all these things
what makes me so deserving
of something that I’ve thrown away
coming back for me today
when I’m still nothing next to You
I’m still nothing next to You

hearts are broken just to mend
when will my brokenness end
lending my mind to dreams it seems
some things are never meant to be
but faith it lingers as I die
inside surrending I cry
I’m still nothing next to You

I’m still nothing without You

and the wonder of it all is I’m still standing
and the wonder of it all is we’re still standing
never planned it
and I wonder where I’ll be next year

time is a broken dream
time is an
endless change
time is an offering
time has an endless sting
time has a world to bring
time, it’s a broken dream
mended while lovers sing

and the wonder of it all is I’m still standing
and the wonder of it all is we’re still standing
never planned it
and I wonder where I’ll be next year

I'm ready for the possibilities....2007, here I come!

Thursday, December 28, 2006

spring schedule

First, J-term:
~Human Exceptionalities from 8:30-12:30, with a break somewhere in there, along with lunch
~Working at CAS, maybe 6-9 hours a week
~Babysitting anywhere from 2-4 hours a week
~Quizzing once a week for an hour and half
~plus studying, plus the quiz meet the first weekend
Doesn't seem too bad.

Spring Semester:
~Arts and Music
~Science and Religion
~Christian Tradition
~Educ Psych
~Linear Algebra (4 credits)
That's pretty intense. Now add:
~about 6 hours of work at CAS
~2-4 hours a week babysitting
~quizzing each week and quiz meets in February and March (I don't know about April)
~lots of reading/studying, I can feel it
~Not to mention preparing for YIM
Yikes!

I'm ready for it, I think. I got thru last semester okay. I want my independence back (i.e., back to the dorm!). This weekend I'm going to my dad's, and I get to visit the Easton church. Hooray!

Monday, December 25, 2006

"Body Piercing..." final quotes

Here it is, guys, the final installment. Maybe. I might have to split it again.

"'Darwin has had as big an impact on the evangelical church, maybe even more so than Jesus. Darwinism has set the tone and focus of the evangelical church in a way that's ludicrous.' By insisting that the Bible is an authoritative text on science, history, and the cosmos, Bazan said, the evangelical church has forced Christians to cultivate a faith that will "flounder" if the Bible's authority is challenged successfully." (132) Lately I've been learning that the Bible is not to be a science textbook or a history textbook. You can interpret historical events in the Bible in light of your textbook, but it's not to be a replacement. I almost feel like I have two timelines in my head--one that was taught in school and one from the Bible. The Bible one is linear, so that the Psalms happen AFTER the material in 1/2 Kings (or one of those history sections), as opposed to around the same time.

"Christians often complain that the mainstream media ignores Christian music, film, and art, and there very existence of their subculture presumes a need to set up an alternate universe with its own celebrities. The world outside this subculture is often portrayed as treacherous and best left alone." (155-6)

"[Contemporary worship music] is self-centered in a way that reflects evangelicalism's near-obsession with having a personal relationship with Christ. It's me Jesus died for. I just gotta praise the Lord." (159)

"The Jesus of worship music is a mentor, a buddy, a friend whose message is easily distilled to a simple command: praise me. Not 'feed the poor, clothe the naked, visit the prisoner.' Simply thank Him for His gift to you." (159)

"Now racism is viewed as much a personal failing, much like alcoholism, drug use, or any number of other moral shortcomings. That's been incredibly important in opening up the evangelicalchurch...allowing Christians to express disappointment at the moral blind spots of others while doing absolutely nothing further." (163) At my church at home, we have a few Japanese exchange students, little Michell (and occasionally her Nicaraguan mother and Puerto Rican dad), and that's about it. Very little diversity. I guess I can't say too much, cuz most of my friends from high school and church were white. Another thing I wonder at my church is the fact that within the past 8 years or so, we have had 3 couples get pregnant before they were married. What is lacking!?!? Where are we falling short as a church community? Just a side thought.

"[Casting Crowns'] lyrics challenge churches not to be so insular that they put off newcomers." (172)

"Christian people are taught to be ready to fight for their faith at a moment's notice. And to a certain degree, that is right. The Bible does say to be ready to defend the faith, but it's very clear that you're not supposed to sit around and nitpick at each other. It's one of the few clear things about the way you're supposed to treat your fellow brothers." (219-20)

"At the same time, I can't be worrying about every single little thing that's gonna offend somebody, because offending somebody and stumbling them are two totally different things." (222)

"College is the kind of place where, if you've grown up within the faith, you're gonna have to think through all this stuff and figure out what's yours and what was your folks' or the environment that you're coming from." (236-7, David Crowder) True story. I'm seeing that now...how my beliefs have shifted (honestly, to be a bit less conservative than I was before)...I'm seeing that morality and beliefs are not as clear-cut as I thought they once were.

"I think when Jesus was talking about the kingdom of heaven, he's speaking of the here and now, and we've got to make a difference in the way we treat people, the way we're responsible with the societies that we live within." (240--David Crowder)

"Somewhere in my heart is longing for something honest and eternal, and all I see is fads and corny T-shirts and young kids who were mostly raised and taught what they should think and haven't had a chance to question it." (263) This summer while I was home, I sat in on the teen Sunday school class, and it basically seemed that the teacher was teaching Creationism AT the class, with very little questioning.

"If I have two jackets, and this person doesn't have one jacket, I give them my extra one. That's just pure common sense. Our conscience tells us that, our Scripture tells us that, our reason tells us that. The only thing that doesn't tell us that is our greed, and the Devil, and the powers of this world who say, What's mine is mine." (263--Weiss) Lately (and not cuz it's Christmas), I'm trying to work through a lot of my stuff and try to live more minimally somehow. I'm not sure how it will ever work, since I'm a packrat. :)

"You know what Jesus called us to do is to come and die, suffer and sacrifice, lay down our lives for other people. Not try to live the most comfortable life we can or have a whole lot of fun or look a certain way." (264) Sometimes I feel like my youth group's activities are oriented around fun activities, meant to bring new people into the youth group. But yet the only discipleship things available are quizzing and Sunday school. Not a bad selection, but it just doesn't seem deep enough. I don't know.

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

a walk down memory lane

The past day or so, I've been looking at old pictures. I dug out an old diary thing from when I was about 8, and it's this American Girl guided journal thing. There's a map of the US, and it has you put hearts where you want to visit, and stars where you've been.

Here's what my 8 or 9 year old mind was like:
I had already been to Massachusetts (fall 95), Florida (age 4), and Minnesota. But I had hearts placed on New York (visited at age 11), Florida (visited at age 13 and 15), the Four Corners, Virginia (been there a few times), Hawaii (too bad I can't go in J-term), and Colorado (went in '05). The random funny ones that I have no idea why I put them there are Wisconsin, Texas, Georgia, and Missouri (but I will be going there in May for YIM haha). The IRONIC ones are that I wanted to go to Illinois (funny...visted Olivet at age 17, and will probably go out there again soon) and Mexico. How funny is THAT?!? Wow.

We finally found the photo of Adam and I at ENC when I was 8, standing with two A Cappella members. Sure enough, Dorothy from South Weymouth is in that picture. Hahaha.

"Some of the best things about growing up are..." "having nice teachers in school and doing multiplication". I was/am such a dork.

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

"Body Piercing..." quotes part two

I have TONS of quotes to put up, and I don't want to force you to read them at once. So here's installment #2.

" 'The biggest category of God's word' in the Psalms, [Kaiser] says, 'has to do with pain, struggle suffering...God doesn't answer every one of our prayers; nor should He." (32) Reminds me of when Michael Card came to ENC and talked about laments.

a cliche: "Comfort the afflicted, and afflict the comfortable."(49)

"Some people, they have a kind of narrow focus that usually widens later on. But I think Christians don't have a monopoly on truth. You can learn about truth from any other religion...pull truth from various sources." (52-DvP) The part about a narrow focus becoming wider is what has been happening to me since going to college, I think. But as far as the truth thing, you can find things that are true, you can also find things that reflect the Truth.

"In focusing on individual belief, evangelicals have necessarily focused on individuals....Poverty, hunger, abortion, drug abuse, and other such issues are approached as personal failings rather than social problems. Systemic elements simply aren't included in the equation" (65 from the book Apostles of Rock)

(Mark Driscoll) "In the Bible, we are told to be culturally relevant, love people who disagree with our Christian beliefs, and have friends and fun like Jesus did. Jesus was often invited to parties by scandalous people, was surrounded with large crowds who liked hanging with him, and was accused by stuffed shirt religious types of eating too much, drinking too much, and having the wronge kind of friends. But, Jesus never sinned. For example, he drank alcohol but did not get drunk, ate a lot but was not a glutton, and had some messed-up friends but never shagged any of the loose women who considered him a friend." (110) This is interesting considering one of my youth leaders once advised our teens to not hang out with their friends anymore if they started smoking or something. I've never been in that situation exactly, but I talk to friends that cuss and I don't cuss. Granted, maybe, in high school, I never let myself get close enough to people that I thought were too "out there" for my tastes, and maybe I could have, and not done the same things they did.

Ballmer about "dispensational premillenialism" (about end times): "this idea 'relieved evangelicals of the obligation to labor for the amelioration of social ills' and that they 'increasingly stood in judgement of culture and awaited its destruction, which would follow their translation into heaven.' In other words, all is not lost for unbelievers, but their salvation, much like their socioeconomic status, is their own responsibility." (122)
Sounds like they just sat there. And waited and twiddled their thumbs and waited some more. Interesting that the Nazarene denomination had such a great emphasis on helping the people on the streets (I think so anyway), and so much of the focus now is on international aid. Not a problem, mind you, but it seems at my church that if we just put some money in the offering plate we are making a REAL difference. Sometimes that's all we can do, but what if we took more of an interest in helping our neighbors....the ones that need help watching their kids, or need help learning to read, or to know English, or tutoring, or opening our homes to disconnected individuals? Instead of keeping in our own little Christian circles, and having people come to us, we should take the initiative and look in our own backyards.

"'As far as I'm aware, drink is mentioned in the Gospels three times,' Stockman replied--none of them having to do with prohibition. Social justice, on the other hand, is something Jesus talks about a lot." (135)

"Body Piercing Saved My Life"

I'm working on reading this book, about Christian rock, and these are some quotes including some of my thoughts about them...

"Christian bookstores, reasonably, decided to take the path of least resistance--to sell music and artwork that couldn't possibly offend any of their customers--and the Christian music industry was relieved to give the bookstores what they wanted....Their pleasant music had lyrics that rarely strayed from safe themes like gratitude toward Jesus and was an ideal soundtrack for evangelical Christianity's new place in the culture--a refuge from a morally ambivalent world where doubt and relativity ruled." (29) So THAT'S why it can make the claim "safe for the whole family"--because it won't offend. But yet Jesus did not come to bring peace....this goes back to the issue of being in our "comfort zone". How are we supposed to grow if we have our own little cushy area? I admit to listening to mostly "Christian" music, which I mostly decided based on their record label, who they toured with, and if they were at the major Christian festivals. Lately though, I've been expanding my horizons--still watching what I listen to though, reading the lyrics and seeing what they're actually saying....testing them.

"Christan bands were making money, but, artistically, they were often a joke." (32) Uh yeah. Like all the female vocalists that sound the same, and following the trends of the mainstream instead of doing their own thing first. Or just being plain annoying.... "Van Pelt issued an impassioned call to Christian bands to try to surpass general-market bands, not just aim to be as good." (46)

"There's this whole subtle idea behind Christian music that you always have to be telling people about Jesus. It's ludicrous because no one who isn't a Christian would ever want to listen to that music." (34)

"We're Christian by faith, not by genre." (42, Tim Foreman of Switchfoot)

"A weakness of Christian music is that it's a subculture, and it's a smaller goldfish bowl, so mediocrity can be perceived as excellence." (50- Doug van Pelt)

"It's not right for me to judge a band by its religious beliefs, just as it's not right for those bands to beg me to find God." (65)

"I mean, missionaries in Europe are drinking, smoking cigarettes, sharing the Gospel; you know, they still don't die young because they're walking around, exercising, riding a bicycle. Meanwhile, big fat Christian pastors in the South are keeling over at forty-five from heart attacks." (68-Ebel) The thing is moderation, of course.

American exceptionalism--the "idea that our country was called by God to be a shining 'city on a hill'." (87)

"In fact, Mars Hill...was named for a place in Athens where the Apostle Paul used the words of contemporary poets and musicians in an attempt to convert non-Christians." (108). This is talking about the Mars Hill church in Seattle, not the one pastored by Rob Bell in Michigan. Basically, I don't think you can have a one-size-fits-all approach to telling others about Jesus. You can try, but it probably won't always work. Whether it's handing out random Bibles, or whatever, it may not work for everyone. There may be better ways of sharing Jesus's love with individuals.

(Driscoll again) "You ladies live your lives, but...expect your life to be completely interrupted when your husband comes along....Different place, different family, different friends, different." (111) This is a new perspective I've heard. Usually it's to find someone close to you, and to "match" yourself with them kind of a thing.

"Each of these men (Sufjan Stevens and Daniel Smith) has built a bigger audience outside the Christian subculture than within it, even while singing explicitly about faith." (116) I missed something. I guess that goes to show I haven't been picking up on the lyrics too much. Oh well.

"There's no harm in Christians engaging popular culture--in fact, it's 'probably blasphemous' to think there's such a thing as a 'secular molecule in the universe,' since everything is shaped by God" (118, talking about David Dark's lecture)

"Has forming Christian pop culture solved the problem? You're less safe when you think you're safe." (119, Ken Heffner)

Heroes

Thanks to some college friends, I started watching the show Heroes on NBC. While home on break, I just caught up with the beginning episodes that I missed. Here are some quotes (episode # is in parentheses). It's interesting to think of these ideas in terms of ourselves as people as well as being Christians and to be helping others.

"Although unaware of it now, these individuals will not only save the world, but change it forever" (1)

"to do something extraordinary" (1)

"Every hero must learn his purpose. Then he'll be tested and called to greatness." (1)

"Every ten year old wishes he had superpowers. And I got them." (1)

"....when the human heart can only find meaning in the smallest of moments" (1)

"By taking action we've changed something" (3)

"Don't give your heart to just anyone" (ad on NY subway in episode 4)

"We are all connected." (5)

"Every hero is on a journey to find his place in the world. But it's a journey. You don't start at the end. Otherwise they can't make a movie about it later." (6) haha

"In the end all that matters is love." (7)

"I'm gonna put this thing on YouTube and make like a million bucks!"
"YouTube's free, you idiot!" (7)

"When I'm by myself, I'm not really anything" (9)

"How do you stop an exploding man?" (9)

Sunday, December 17, 2006

words

So here I am: no more disguise, no longer blinded
(Charlie Hall)

Here I am tonight with my arms open wide
(Shawn McDonald)

Chase the dreams we're after
(Plumb)

I have found the answer is to love You and be loved by You alone
(Shane and Shane)

You've been so faithful for all my years
(Jeremy Camp)

Take this life, won't you change this life
(Shawn McDonald)

I've been trying to practice my Spanish, and relearn some vocabulary...I talked to Darling tonight, who's from Nicaragua. Yay :). Mary Ann helped me out a bit, in figuring out that "to pretend" was "fingir". Something I need to remember how to do is to try to talk words through if I don't know them, like, "the thing that does this" so that I get the meaning across. Oh boy.

I'm going to DC on Thursday with Jocelyn. Hooray! We're going to this Bible exhibit, and two war memorials, and I guess whatever else we find.

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

quizzing at home

Tonight was my first Wednesday night at home, and since I was able to go to my home church, I decided to go to quizzing. It was nice to enjoy our way of doing things, but at the same time, I was thinking of the differences between my home church's way and Wolly's way.

First, there's the time difference and the number of quizzers. We started at just past 7 and finished just before 8. Wolly has 12 quizzers, a number of ENCers, and Prof. We have Mr. Lucien, sometimes Mr. Norman, and Jen/Adam/Lauren J, Chelsea H, and my brother. It's a family thing. Haha. :)

The room and the way we sit reflects our team dynamics, I think. At Wolly, we are all in a circle, and that shows how the quiz teams are a community. A lot of different people talk throughout the time we are circled up. At home, Mr. Lucien will sit in the front, and we'll be in a sort of line next to each other, sort of like a classroom. He'll talk and we'll listen, maybe ask questions or add comments.

This week we went over chapter 18, and basically Mr. Lucien went through the material and explained why some things were signficant in terms of Paul's ministry and his later epistles, the geography of the area covered (and their modern-day names), and what some of the terms meant (like tentmaker). It was interesting that he also talked about the scattering of the Christians as time went on--because of persecution, so that they wouldn't stay clustered. He mentioned how Jesus had had them go on short jaunts on their own, as practice for later. Then they just ended up staying in the room all by themselves even after his promise in 1:8. We talked about how times of events were referred to in terms of reigns of rulers ("while Gallio was proconsul of Achaia").

With Wolly, for the whole group at least, there is more of a devotional approach/emphasis to it. We don't really get the historical context and interesting little details, because that would take a lot of time out of the competition practicing. I suppose individuals could do the research, but I think they're more focused on memorizing it.

I am, however, redwording my portion. It makes me chuckle how "Red" is a red word. :)

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

saying it again...

Yes, everyone, I've said this a bazillion times, but I LOVE WOLLY QUIZZING.

Tonight was our last practice before all of us ENCers head out for break. Sadly, it was also Shea's and Jenny O's last practice ever. I'm wicked sad that they're leaving. Shea because there will now be a "Shea-shaped hole" in quizzing, in Science and Religion class next semester, and in life overall. Jenny O because she is cool and from out west and now has named what I'm doing next fall. :)

We "gave each other gifts" in the form of compliments, saying what we appreciated about the group as a whole, or about specific individuals. It was wonderful. Especially the goodies Sondra brought.

First of all, Lucas kept us all laughing...not constantly, but still. He asked me if the little koosh type dinosaur was edible (the one that looked like Jennie's Phillip). Ohhh Lucas. He shared at least 5 times, and Prof stopped him after 5 (or so). One of the times, he couldn't remember what he was going to say (seems to happen a lot?), and said something along the lines of 30
seconds would pass, and then he'd get it wrong, but then remember. Haha.

Second, it was just good for everyone to see that they were appreciated for SOMETHING, even if it's not always said. Like me with my organization and "logic"--"It's a good logic, it's not a mean logic," Luke said. Heh. And then a little while later, I was like, "Hey guys, for all this talk of organization, Jenny O's card seems to have vanished." Then it was found. :) You also had the people who were simply described by their names--Preston and Andrew. :)

So yeah, I'm definitely a "words of affirmation" type person. :) Pastor Mike called me right
before dinner!!!! I haven't talked to him in what seems like eons! I only got to talk to him for a little bit before eating, but I'm going to call him Saturday once I'm done with stuff. I can't wait to catch up with him later.

I can't wait to hear about YIM...though...one of my references didn't get in to them. Hopefully that'll be fine. If God wants me to go, I'll go. Easy as pie, right? I hope so.

I have to study now for Foundations of Ed and Calc 3. Gross. At least the room is quiet for right now. These next few days are going to be some intense days of working and studying. BUT...at least I'm done with CAS for the semester!
Kbye.