God's provision

I just want to take a couple minutes and talk about how God's providing for my trip, in some somewhat-unexpected ways.

Last year, besides doing letters, I shared at my home church during the service, and also was invited to set up a display at district NMI convention and share during that. Also, my college church allocated a portion of their Faith Promise funds to another ENC YIM student and myself.

This year, I knew I had to trust God to provide for my trip. There was otherwise no way I could afford the trip along with gas money, car insurance payments, and a cell phone bill each month. So it became a matter of knowing that I was somehow going to go on this trip, but it was going to be totally God providing. I've sent out many letters, and a few emails, so now it's up to God.

Well, within the past couple weeks, I've definitely seen God providing, even if they are small bits at a time. (Hey, however God provides, that's fine with me!) A few people who I weren't expecting to contribute did, especially when I called one up specifically one day.

I hadn't thought that I'd be able to go to my NMI convention (being as I hadn't heard anything), but ran into my district president today quite by surprise. After talking with him for a little bit, we determined that I could do something similar this year--setting up a display and then sharing in front of everyone--because I had a way down there (and yes, I'd only miss one day of class, but whatever).

Then, tonight, was something really neat. I went over to Wolly to see one of my quizzers and get something from her (turned out to be a box of Thin Mints--yum!), and stopped to talk to a few other people. A woman that I have become acquainted with came up to me and asked, "How do you plan on financing your trip?" I told her, "Well, I hope that people will help me out." She replied, "My husband and I would like to contribute/help." They gave me $200!!!

Of the $3800 that my trip costs (that figure includes my airfare to and from Training and Reentry camps), God has provided--through the help of my friends--$485!! Yeah!

Proverbs 3:5-6 (NIV)....Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.

(In the Message translation....) Trust God from the bottom of your heart; don't try to figure out everything on your own. Listen for God's voice in everything you do, everywhere you go; he's the one who will keep you on track.

"One of these things, is not like the other things, one of these things just doesn't belong..."

I have just finished my two first days of classes for spring semester, and boy does it look like a crazy semester.

CLASSES....

MWF
9:05am Living Issues--required core class, relating to ethics and morality. This one should be no problem, and I'm looking forward to it. Severson's a good professor, and a couple of my friends are in the course.

11:30am Theology II. That's right, I'm in Theology II. Have I ever taken Theology I? Nope. Am I a religion major? Нет. (pronounced NYET, which is no in Russian). Am I looking at going into "the ministry"? Not exactly...though I'm not closing off the possibility.

That's where the title of this blog comes in: "One of these things is not like the other things, one of these things just doesn't belong, can you guess which thing is not like the other things, before I finish my song?" (old Sesame Street song)

I signed up for the course because I am attempting to have a religion minor (which, as it turns out, I won't finish) as a way to fill out my schedule for this year. I thought the course was an independent course, but it isn't quite that way. I think there's an article that the prof will give me from last semester, so I'm not terribly lost.

12:50pm Trigonometry. No problem here--in fact, it'll be a break after Theology II. Nadine's in this class, along with some more of my friends.

T/Th:
11am Differential Equations. So far so good. I just have to get used to Hammerstrom's way of teaching, as opposed to Lovett's. Plus, I haven't done any sort of calculus in a year, nor have I had Hammerstrom in a year.

4pm (Th). Developing Reading Skills in the Content Area. Andrew and I are the only undergrads in this course, but it's with Fiacco, so it won't be bad.

6pm (Tu until 2/19). Educ Assessment. I'll be glad when this 5-week sprint of a course is done! Whew! Lots of work to do in a small space of time. After this date, I'll be back down to 15 credits, and how nice that will be. :)

JOBS....
3 hours a week in CAS, editing papers, helping with math, and working on the stats.
2 hours a week tutoring students at Atlantic Middle.
2 hours a week tutoring a student in the library.
Babysitting as needed.

CHURCH INVOLVEMENT....
Finishing out the season of Bible quizzing with Wollaston
Potentially helping with the S. Weymouth youth group

MISSIONS INVOLVEMENT...
Preparing for my own trip to the Ukraine with Youth in Mission! Yeah!
Leading Advance Training for all the YIM students from ENC for this summer.

May 15....come soon....

Hands and Feet

An image flashed across my TV screen
Another broken heart comes into view
I saw the pain and I turned my back
Why can't I do the things I want to?
I'm willing yet I'm so afraid
You give me strength
When I say

CHORUS:
I want to be your hands
I want to be your feet
I'll go where you send me
I'll go where you send me
And I'll try, yeah I'll try
To touch the world like
You touched my life
And I'll find my way
To be your hands

I've abandoned every selfish thought
I've surrendered every thing I've got
You can have everything I am
And perfect everything I'm not
I'm willing, I'm not afraid
You give me strength when I say

CHORUS

This is the last time I turned my back on you
From now on, I'll go so
Send me where You want me to
I finally have a mission
I promise I'll complete
I don't need excuses
When I am your hands and feet

How time flies...

Four years ago, I returned from a trip to Nicaragua.

Three years ago, I was a senior in high school.

Two years ago, I was on my way to Belize and Guatemala.

One year ago, I was taking a J-term course called Human Exceptionalities, for working with special needs students.

Six months ago, I was in Mexico (this was the day Joel brought Angela back to us, we cleaned some of the Sunday School rooms, and we went door to door to evangelize!).

Six months from now, I will be somewhere in the Ukraine. Wow!

One year from now, I will begin my time as a student teacher somewhere in Quincy, MA.

uh oh...

I am going to do my best to make sure this is NOT a rant, but rather as objective as possible...here goes.

Today my pastor preached on "The Man Who Saved Christmas"--Joseph. He talked about how Joseph's motivation was to take care of the Baby, no matter what.

However, I had a few problems with this sermon, based on the answers I seemed to get to the following questions...

1. What does this sermon tell me about how I am to live?
2. What does this sermon tell me about the nature of Christ?
3. What does this sermon tell me about the nature of Scriptures?

(in no particular order...)

He wondered aloud at how Joseph's friends might have responded to the situation. They might have said, "Do what the Bible says." First of all, it wasn't the Bible as we know it today--it would have been called the Torah, or the Scriptures. Minor detail. Moving right along... He said that in those times, the law called for the stoning to death of a woman who was found pregnant before her marriage--regardless of the father. Clearly Joseph did not have this done--he wanted to divorce her quietly, and not expose her to public disgrace.

Rev. pointed out that Joseph disobeyed the written word of God. He said that it is not always good to do exactly what the Bible says, but that we should look at the wording but also listen to the Spirit. We should also look for the character of God, and discern what God would really do.

I think you are treading some dangerous ground here...I agree that you shouldn't always take the literal interpretation as being the actual facts or what to do today, but sometimes things are symbolic, or later take on another dimension/meaning. What I am thinking about here is the collection of OT laws and the sacrificial system--once Christ came, they were fulfilled and now are reminders of many things: how God set the Jews apart from the nations around them, how God made a way for them to know where they stood with the divine, how God cared for them, etc. In other words, you use the Scripture to interpret itself.

But to say "it is not always good to do exactly what the Bible says"?!? The Bible may not say explicitly what to do, but God is speaking through it. Somebody may hear this, and then go ahead and use it for their own personal gain/benefit, claiming this as support for what they are doing. He did use a verse to support this, but did not explain how the verse supported this statement. "If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters—yes, even his own life—he cannot be my disciple" (Luke 14:26). He did not clarify that "hate" is not hate as we might take it to mean, an intense disliking for someone, but that our love for family and loved ones should seem like hate, because it pales in comparison to our love for God. (That's the most common interpretation I've heard. Any other thoughts?)

I agree that we should listen to the Spirit, because otherwise, the words on the pages are simply ink and space. I agree that we should look for the character of God, because that is what comes through in the writing--not necessarily the human perspective.

In other parts of the sermon (taken from my notes):
We cannot live without unforgettable dreams. God has dreams.
Joseph took care of the baby, at all costs, like the Navajos (?) during WWII with their codes

Another quote from today's sermon caught me: "I think Joseph taught him all he knew about God." WAIT ONE SECOND! Jesus was God. I'm pretty sure Jesus knew himself. Actually, I'm 100% confident. Giving him the benefit of the doubt, maybe Rev. meant that Joseph taught him, not necessarily that Joseph's teachings were all that Jesus knew. But if this was not what he meant--then what does it tell us about the nature of Christ? Was Jesus not divine until a certain point in his life? Were floodgates of knowledge opened when he was x years old? I am curious to know about Jesus's childhood, but that can wait till heaven. Jesus was fully divine and fully human, for all of his time on earth. I'm not sure how the math works out, but that's okay.

One of my issues with these sermons is that I don't get much out of them in terms of how I am to live. This sermon, however, gave me a little bit. That I should look for the character of God when I read the Bible.

I talked to him the other day, and he said it is tough to challenge everyone, because everyone is at different levels spiritually. I agree--I have seen that in terms of teaching math: not everyone is at the same level because some may not need as much to motivate them. However, there has got to be some way to preach so that everyone grows in some way. I think in education that's called multi-level instruction. Is that really possible in preaching? If God's hand is upon your sermon preparation, then I have to believe that God will speak in some way to every person, to some degree.

I'm trying, I'm really trying, to listen for the good, and listen for what God might be telling me. But it's really hard sometimes.

What are your thoughts?

cemetery wanderings

This afternoon while I was waiting for my car to be serviced, I walked across the street to the cemetery and walked around. Seems as though that is a weird thing for people to do, but I like reading some of the inscriptions, and looking at the really old ones. I'm not creeped out very easily--like my teammates said one time, I'm like Braveheart.

Some interesting information I found:
~There were twins born in August in the 1800s sometime, and one died that October, and one in December--not even 6 months old!
~A lot of the epitaphs had to do with resting... "Sleeping sweetly", for example.
~I saw the phrase, "At eveningtime there will be light" which, as I've just learned, comes from Zechariah 14:7.

[I like the quote at the bottom of this: "How sweet it will be in that beautiful land. So free from all sorrow and pain: With songs on our lips and harps in our hands. To meet one another again."]

I inadvertently found the headstone for my great-great-grandparents: Thomas R Starr and R Hattie (Mellott) Starr. He was born in 1867, died in 1951. She lived between 1876 and 1938.

On another headstone for "Henrietta Elizabeth; wife of Stewart Matthews. Born Nov. 20, 1844, died May 4, 1904" also had Proverbs 31:28 on it. "Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her."

classroom experience

Substitute teaching is a lot like babysitting. The students already have a routine, and all you do is come in and make sure they are following that routine--doing their work.

Today I did 5th grade at my old elementary school--if my cousin had been there, she'd have been in my class. These students were more on task than the ones I had yesterday, and I also took many turns about the room. I also tried to use more nonverbal indications that I saw them goofing off and that they should get back on task (proximity and eye contact). It was "exciting" to see that work. However, I had about 5 students complain, "My stomach hurts" and wanting to go to the nurse. Only one really had a legitimate complain, and later went home. At the end of the day (after I had run out of nurse's slips, actually), the nurse told me to just be firm with them, and that they were simply doing it because I was the substitute.

I could also tell which students were the ones with special needs, not just by their academics or their attention span, but also by the way they interacted with others. One girl told me, almost in a Drew-Barrymore-type way, "You're nice." Made me smile on the inside.

It was both strange and fun to be on "the other side of the teacher's desk," by teaching at my old school. It was nice to see my teachers again, but at the same time, I was just catching up with everyone, and many of them remembered me. I did get some insights as to how MD schools work, differently than MA schools. I remember when I was a fifth grader, that we changed classes in 4th and 5th grades--but now the supervisor of curriculum and instruction is opposed to any departmentalization in elementary school. One of my fifth grade teachers thinks that not even sixth graders should change classes--they're not ready for it. This same teacher said to me, "You'll probably be back" (in terms of coming to the county to teach). I don't know about that....

The culture here is also different than what I've been used to in Quincy. Only one student (of the two schools so far) has made any indication of being a Patriots or Red Sox fan. Down here, there are more fans of Philadelphia Eagles, Baltimore Ravens, and various other teams. Yesterday, at one school's "Sports Day" for their "spirit week", I saw ONE Maine hockey jersey and nothing for sports teams from New York or Boston/New England. Bizarre.

this is a call

Two days I returned "home" from college for Christmas break, with an intention of substitute teaching while QA schools were still in session. I figured it'd be a good way for me to get some teaching experience, and earn some money on the side. :)

On Saturday, I called the Central Call System to see if any jobs were available. The way Central Call works is that the automated system will list potential jobs for one's acceptance or rejection, and gives the teacher's name, grade, and time. There are set time periods where the system will call potential substitutes in the morning and evening.

Once I got back from church tonight, I made sure my phone's ringer was on, so that I would be ready for any calls from the system. Around 8pm, my phone rang, and the caller ID indicated that it was from the town where my Board of Education is. Putting aside my brother's math question for the time being, I answered the phone and paid close attention. I followed the steps of the automated recordings, and listened to the job listing at KES in 3rd grade. Knowing that the system also records whether or not you accept jobs, I chose to accept this job. Third graders are fun too. :D

After a little while, I began preparing for the next day--making my lunch (I've had enough caf food for awhile), and figuring out what I should take with me.

I couldn't help but notice the parallels in this situation to listening for God's call. We should be aware of when God might be calling us or speaking to us--which is really any time, not just a few hours out of the day. When He does call us, we should be ready to listen and obey, disregarding other concerns (even family-?). Because He has called us, we should be willing to accept that call, no matter what it is.

After that, we should prepare for whatever it is God has called us. It could be beginning to take the next steps, researching the scenario, or otherwise preparing and obeying.

Ukraine thoughts

Going to the Ukraine, or even to my second YIM choice, Portugal, is going to be a lot different than anything I've ever experienced.

I speak English, Spanish, and a little bit of French--nothing related to Ukrainian or Russian that would even help me out a bit.....According to my mom, my doctor said that if I'm working with kids, they'll probably speak English. I am in no way counting on ANYTHING. haha.

I've never travelled over the Atlantic--my cross-cultural experiences have been with English or Spanish speakers for the most part, with maybe a little that one night I went to something at Quincy Chinese COTN....

Not to mention the process of raising money AND paying for other stuff too...like car insurance and a cell phone bill.

But you know, I figure, if God wants me to go on this trip, He will provide. He will work everything out. I just have to trust Him. These are easier said than done, of course. I'm going to try my hardest not to get ahead of myself in terms of planning for next summer (May and August), even though I've got some ideas about what to do. It may even mean sacrificing some things that I would really like to do.

Rob Bell: The Gods Aren't Angry Tour

The following are some quotes and thoughts I had this past weekend, and I've bolded the ones I found significant....It was an AMAZING talk/lecture, and I can't wait for the DVD.
*Challenging in that I should look for ways to be an "agent of blessing," a minister of reconciliation in the world, in my very community (which is by and large a Christian bubble....that needs to change)
*Amusing...quotes
*Tidbits I had never heard before, or new (more dimensional) ways of looking at the same old Sunday School stories

"Cave husband goes on a hunt when he's not selling auto insurance"
"Watch how articulate I am"
bursting of life force, breath, etc.
forces she is totally dependent on, beyond her control
gave personalities to these life forces
Artemis = Greek goddess of hunting, and also protector of small animals (hahahaha)
Sumer: Nin-Kossi = goddess of beer-"like the Tigris and the Euphrates"

projections of human behavior--these forces are somewhere else, doing what they do, we react to their movements, and we need these forces on our side
offer sacrifices, high place (to go up), altars
tragic flaw in the concept: vicious cycle, vortex of anxiety:
if things went well, you offered more in your sacrifice
if things went poorly, you offered more to appease the gods
never quite know where you stood with the gods
examples of trying to keep gods appeased:
Baal: followers cut themselves to show how devoted they were--shed their own blood
"Sardis--known for their choirs" Kibbalah spring ritual
Molech: offered firstborn in the fire

"if you've ever been trapped in a hotel and Gideon got there first"

Abraham:
Sumerian gods are detached: but this divine Being was acting within human history and interacting within time
"to leave his father's household" meant to leave the worldview his father taught and how to navigate the forces out of his control
"a whole new tomorrow"
Sumerians: history is cyclical
this story insisted tomorrow is not an extension of today
be an "agent of blessing" to others--purpose is not to try and bless the gods: radical new idea
Sumerians worshiped the stars: "this God used the other gods as props!"
"Eventually father Abraham had many sons, and many sons had father Abraham..." :)
first mention of love in the Bible
"His greatness comes from his willingness to kill his son--flannelgraph that!"
why doesn't Abraham question it--it's as if it's a normal thing: gods demand what is most precious
story ends with God providing, not showing how great Abraham is
brand new day for Abraham: God telling him, "I don't operate like that"
not about humans providing for gods
trust, intimate relationship

Leviticus: "It's like a B-grade slasher movie--here's how to kill things and where to put the blood"
what to do with redemption
*animal/grain offerings: "Come near to God": idea of nearness to the divine was a new idea for humanity
*everything in its right place: word related to shalom
meal celebrates being at peace with the divine and with others--humans can know where they stand with the divine
*types of sacrifices
then the matter is over
dragging culture forward

people making gain off of guilt and fear of the masses: priests (Sadducees) got a cut of the sacrifices, and so they had a vested interest in that system, a system of violence
were connected to the Roman government, so it was an entire military-economic-religious system

Jesus:
"one greater than the Temple is here"
driving out the moneychangers: gesture to sear upon their conscience
living breathing sermon--this way is over
"Destroy this temple and I will rebuild it in 3 days"
identifies himself with the system (new way), to render old system obsolete, so they killed him
"put away your sword"--if He resorts to violence, has He offered anything new? [like nonviolent resistance: Gandhi]

cutting and suicide attempts of teens wanting acceptance
Masai elders: no way to reenter in relationship of community--man on edge of village
brokenness, suffering
do we bow down to some of the same forces that are never satisfied at all?

for Jews: wrestle with implications of Jesus being killed by the system
new day for all of humanity, not just one sect
writer of Hebrews: "culmination of the ages"
by ultimate sacrifice of himself
Colossians: made peace, reconciling all things through Jesus
eliminating human compulsion
not having to offer sacrifices anymore
"Jesus saves the goats and the chickens" (guy in Rwanda)

Psalm 50-blood unneeded
Micah-blood doesn't please God
Hebrews-impossible
blood was for your conscience, human need
sacrifice--matter is done
ritual would help you go through the experience, with a God you can be at peace with
centers you, reawakens you to reconciliation of all things
not going to church: why do you go? to ease God anxiety? wronged some Being?

peace that has already been made
shouldn't pile you with more obligations
put him back together, so he can bring reconciliation

our sacrifice to please God: serve others
Romans 12:1--put flesh and blood on this reconciliation

and my FAVORITE part, the BEST part...
"You don't have to live like this anymore. You don't have to live like this...."
girl who cuts: "You don't embarrass me"
Jesus' exact words: "I don't remember."
He leaned down and kissed her crooked mouth, and said, "I like it."
"No one has ever trusted me like this before."
minivan full of groceries
giving the house to the single mom